Truth

The truth has been on my mind a lot lately. For some mystical reason it scares me to death, which is very ironical in my case.

"What is it in us that seeks the truth? Is it our minds or is it our hearts?"
That quote keeps begging my ego to pay attention to it. But why? Is the truth that my mind perceives not the same as the one that my heart feels?

During confusing times like these, I like going down to the cemetery and visit the graves of all the people I once knew. That's why I'm here right now. They may not talk back to me or provide me with any insights that are not my own, but being here soothes my mind and opens my heart. If there would be such a place where these two could wage their war, it would be here.

"He was a friend of yours?", a strange voice suddenly asks.
It's an elderly woman, probably his mother. She struggles with her balance while she kneels by the grave to lay down some flowers. I help her up again and we share a smile of compassion that we both seem to appreciate.

"No, I only knew him briefly. In that short time, though, I loved him for his strength and his good heart. He was ..." I pause for a minute and she completes my sentence "taken away from us too quickly."

All I can do is nod in agreement. She wasn't there that night, but he really was.

"He was my son.", she continues.

I was right. I never know them for very long, but I never forget their faces either.

I look at the old woman's tears and I wonder what it is about the truth that scares me so much. I guess the truth could change everything. She's a sweet, gentle woman now, but if she knew only a tiny portion of the truth, she wouldn't smile, but scream at me. She wouldn't thank me, but condemn me to hell and if it were in her power, she would even send me there herself. The truth could change everything and I guess my heart feels it, while my mind is still convinced that it will never see the light of day.

I overlook the cemetery, proud of all the graves that are there because of me and I realize that my heart is right, there are some truths that even the grave cannot keep buried forever.